You can tell a lot by what happens in the first few minutes of a session.
Does the coach greet the child with a smile, or dive straight into instructions?
Is the athlete offered choices, or told what’s happening without being asked?
Does the environment flex to meet the child, or is the expectation that the child will flex first?
For people of determination, these questions aren’t small. They set the tone for whether participation feels possible or whether another wall is being built.
A lifetime of adapting
Most of us move through the world without thinking about whether we belong in a classroom, a swimming pool, or a football pitch. But for many people of determination, those spaces are filled with hidden barriers. Too often, they spend their days adapting—to routines not designed for them, to instructions that come too quickly, to environments that weren’t built with them in mind.
It’s exhausting. And it sends a quiet message: “You fit here only if you change first.”
When the space shifts instead
That’s why the first few minutes of a session matter so much. When the environment flexes—when a coach pauses to offer a choice, when the pace is adjusted, when the welcome feels genuine, the entire dynamic shifts.
You can see it happen. Shoulders unclench. Eyes lift. Parents relax into the background instead of standing guard. Trust begins to form, not just in the coach or the program, but in the child’s own sense of belonging.
It isn’t about getting everything right. It’s about practicing inclusion until it feels natural.
Small actions, lasting impact
Inclusion often feels intimidating to those who haven’t tried it. Coaches may worry about saying the wrong thing. Parents may hesitate to bring their child into a new setting. Teachers and service providers may fear they don’t have the training to “do it properly.”
But inclusion doesn’t begin with perfection. It begins with intention.
- Offering a choice instead of a directive.
- Slowing down instructions and checking for understanding.
- Making eye contact, sharing a smile, letting the child know they are seen.
These are not grand gestures, but they carry weight. They say: “You don’t have to change who you are to be here. We will make space for you.”
A reflection for all of us
The first few minutes of any interaction, whether on a sports field, in a classroom, or at a clinic, are a chance to open doors or close them. We all can make those moments count.
The next time you begin a session, pause and ask yourself:
- Am I inviting this person in, or asking them to adapt to me?
- Am I creating pressure, or creating space?
- Am I starting from empathy?
Inclusion doesn’t require perfection. It requires presence. It requires the willingness to shift the weight from the child to the system, from the individual to the environment.
And when we practice that, minute by minute, session by session, we build something far bigger than skills or fitness. We build belonging.